6 Comments

Waiting to jump in to help our kids is great advice. Although I tend to wait…a *lot* longer than 17 seconds before helping my kids out with something they’re struggling with.

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Good point! I should've said that 17 seconds is the absolute minimum, barring real emergencies!

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I did this on Monday when my son and his buddy started to argue while playing with bricks and mud in our backspace. I could only hear them but asked the other mom with me to wait 17 seconds. She was so confused but did it and the kids worked it out!

I loved the link for the play scenarios and have passed it around. Thank you!

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So happy to hear this!

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I’m really enjoying your posts Katherine. Maria Montessori used to count her rosary beads to stop her jumping in too soon when her presence wasn’t actually necessary. And when my daughter was tiny and learning to settle herself to sleep, I used to count while I waited to see if she’d settle by herself, or if I needed to step in. It felt better than just waiting, and easily 90% of the time she turned out not to need me at all. Great to be reminded of this helpful trick!

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That idea about the rosary beads is great! It is counterintuitive, but "subtracting" oneself from the equation (as a parent) can do wonders.

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