This hits on such an uncomfortable truth. Much of the push toward packed summer schedules isn’t just about enrichment but about control. In a world where screens are ever-present and parenting feels like a high-stakes performance, structure becomes a safety net. But what is the cost of this? Kids who are always occupied and never free to explore their own minds.
I love this and completely agree that kids need more boredom and less unhealthy stimulation. However, adults need to realize we don't really have any options. Maybe not you, but many kids (like me) are fully car dependent. Our parents are with us, supervising us all the time. Every day (especially in the dreaded summers) is me and my mom battling it out over time. Should she do what she wants on her own schedule or should she drive me around more? I can't on my own because I don't have a license or car yet, let alone my 11 year old sister.
Not only do we need parents to be less controlling, monitoring, and overprotective, we also need the SPACE. Which is out of our parent's control. I live in a small neighborhood with only one place for me and my sister to play. The hot asphalt cul de sac with the play ground set from Costco. We only know a couple of our neighbors and no kids, even though there's about a hundred houses in the development. I felt so bad when I saw a boy about my sisters age with a lemonade stand in front of his house. Also lots of kids live in neighborhood with very small backyards where we can't play many games because the mosquitos will get us and the balls will go over the fence. We need more neighborhoods with third places that are safe for kids to play unsupervised. Sadly, I don't live in one, but they just built one in my town called Sawnee Village in Cumming, GA. Look it up. The houses are tight, but have plenty of shared lawn.
About a week later, I saw 2 little girls running a lemonade stand at the FRONT of the neighborhood, by the super fast highway (not a highway highway, just that's what its called and the cars are going pretty fast plus they're adding lanes) and BOTH of their parents were there supervising, and practically doing the lemonade stand for them. All the girls were doing was running the orders to the cars. It reminded me of those kids who come into class with the best project because their mom did it for them.
The point is we don't have many options so that's why we're on screens all day.
I run cross country and track, so I'm always thinking about how I wish I could go run at the park or greenway, but I can't, because my mom works from home 9 to 5 and has meetings all day and can't take me. Running in my "neighborhood" is just running up and down on 2 hot hellish hills.
I'm sure my friends only live a few miles away, and that if our area were bikable, we could meet up in a third place like the park and play together. Just two problems:
We did the same thing one summer…too much! And enjoyed our freedom from then on. Summer vacation is a huge childhood blessing and yes, you have to think through how to best use it.
I love all of this and I know my 9yo would be so much happier playing all day with other kids unsupervised. There's a kind of neutral area in my neighborhood perfect for this. However, all of the parents in my neighborhood have decided because homeless people and/or murderers could be lurking in that neutral space, kids are not allowed to play anywhere with an adult present. So I dutifully (and uselessly) sit on the curb while they play, I guess to defend them from murderers.
Logically, I know the risk is super small, and kids are way more likely to be assaulted/murdered by someone they know than a random stranger literally lurking in the bushes. But because the risk is not zero, we can't have a feral summer (I am trying to make it as feral as possible, I just wish she had friends to play with without me having to be there).
This hits on such an uncomfortable truth. Much of the push toward packed summer schedules isn’t just about enrichment but about control. In a world where screens are ever-present and parenting feels like a high-stakes performance, structure becomes a safety net. But what is the cost of this? Kids who are always occupied and never free to explore their own minds.
I love this and completely agree that kids need more boredom and less unhealthy stimulation. However, adults need to realize we don't really have any options. Maybe not you, but many kids (like me) are fully car dependent. Our parents are with us, supervising us all the time. Every day (especially in the dreaded summers) is me and my mom battling it out over time. Should she do what she wants on her own schedule or should she drive me around more? I can't on my own because I don't have a license or car yet, let alone my 11 year old sister.
Not only do we need parents to be less controlling, monitoring, and overprotective, we also need the SPACE. Which is out of our parent's control. I live in a small neighborhood with only one place for me and my sister to play. The hot asphalt cul de sac with the play ground set from Costco. We only know a couple of our neighbors and no kids, even though there's about a hundred houses in the development. I felt so bad when I saw a boy about my sisters age with a lemonade stand in front of his house. Also lots of kids live in neighborhood with very small backyards where we can't play many games because the mosquitos will get us and the balls will go over the fence. We need more neighborhoods with third places that are safe for kids to play unsupervised. Sadly, I don't live in one, but they just built one in my town called Sawnee Village in Cumming, GA. Look it up. The houses are tight, but have plenty of shared lawn.
About a week later, I saw 2 little girls running a lemonade stand at the FRONT of the neighborhood, by the super fast highway (not a highway highway, just that's what its called and the cars are going pretty fast plus they're adding lanes) and BOTH of their parents were there supervising, and practically doing the lemonade stand for them. All the girls were doing was running the orders to the cars. It reminded me of those kids who come into class with the best project because their mom did it for them.
The point is we don't have many options so that's why we're on screens all day.
I run cross country and track, so I'm always thinking about how I wish I could go run at the park or greenway, but I can't, because my mom works from home 9 to 5 and has meetings all day and can't take me. Running in my "neighborhood" is just running up and down on 2 hot hellish hills.
I'm sure my friends only live a few miles away, and that if our area were bikable, we could meet up in a third place like the park and play together. Just two problems:
1. our parents wouldn't let us
2. we're car dependent
And that's why I'm a serial substack commenter!
We did the same thing one summer…too much! And enjoyed our freedom from then on. Summer vacation is a huge childhood blessing and yes, you have to think through how to best use it.
I love all of this and I know my 9yo would be so much happier playing all day with other kids unsupervised. There's a kind of neutral area in my neighborhood perfect for this. However, all of the parents in my neighborhood have decided because homeless people and/or murderers could be lurking in that neutral space, kids are not allowed to play anywhere with an adult present. So I dutifully (and uselessly) sit on the curb while they play, I guess to defend them from murderers.
Logically, I know the risk is super small, and kids are way more likely to be assaulted/murdered by someone they know than a random stranger literally lurking in the bushes. But because the risk is not zero, we can't have a feral summer (I am trying to make it as feral as possible, I just wish she had friends to play with without me having to be there).